Burden Of Proof

Title: Burden Of Proof

Author: Suz W.

Feedback: I would love to hear from you!

Spoilers: After Frozen (episode tag)

Old Stories Referenced: “Making A Difference” and “Reflections Of The Heart”

Rating: R, S/J Romance, Friendship, Sexual Situations, Angst, and Hurt/Comfort.

Summary: As those at Stargate command wait for Jack to return after being implanted with a symbiote to heal him, Sam is forced to deal with her own personal agony over what has happened to Jack.

Disclaimer: All publicity recognizable characters and places are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes and no infringement on copyrights or trademarks was intended.

Copyright: The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. Copyrighted on June 21, 2005, by Suzanne R. Whitmarsh.

Author’s Notes: This story follows “Making A Difference”. This is another emotionally charged story, focusing on Sam and Jack’s love as it is tested by the elements of life. And as per several requests on doing a better job at distinguishing between dream states and reality, I will notate a dream with ** before I begin the sequence and will close the dream with **. Hope this helps! I hope that you’re finding my stories are providing you with a deeper insight to each episode as you watch them, and give you a new perspective to Stargate SG-1. Thanks for all your support and dedication to my series and all my writings! I couldn’t do it without you!

Dedication: This story is dedicated to Mark. Thanks for being such a fun friend and great supporter of my stories! It means a great deal to me to hear your feedback and to know that you’ll be there to read the next story, no matter how long I take to get it written (I’m hanging my head in shame…hehe!).

Sam hugged her knees to her chest with her arms as she sat on a small rock formation. Her eyes traced across the sky, taking in its blood red color, watching as the sun made it’s decent towards the horizon. She had seen amazing sunsets on Earth, but there was something about this sunset that had her mesmerized. It seemed to be drawing her in, piercing her inner core, and sent a chill down her spine despite the warmth of the passing day.

Closing her eyes, she allowed a salty tear to escape, and felt the tickle of its progress down her cheek as the wind softly brushed it along. But closing her eyes to the light only allowed the darkness to bring back the horrid memories of what she had just witnessed. Jack’s face ran through her mind over and over again, distorted with shock and pain as the symbiote entered his mouth. She had forced herself to stay with her teammates and watch the blending, knowing that Jack, though unconscious, would want her there with him. Though she had seen it before with her father, and experienced it for herself with Jolinar, nothing had quite prepared her for having to watch the man she loved more than life go through that.

Upon the moment of blending, when Jack opened his eyes just briefly, allowing the familiar glow to illuminate his face, Sam felt her stomach drop and her throat close up. When his eyes closed again, she knew that she had to get out of there. She needed some air to clear her head and hopefully stabilize her stomach. Making excuses to her teammates, she ran to the nearest ring transporter and headed for the surface.

And so she found herself alone, with her thoughts and the ache in her heart. Opening her eyes again, she wiped at her tears, blinking quickly to clear up her vision as she stared across the grassy meadows in front of her. Among the tall, waving grass, small wildflowers in a variety of colors danced back and forth. In the distance, a forest stretched out around her in a crescent shape. And to her left, the Stargate loomed in the fading light, making it almost seem surreal.

Lost in her thoughts, she jumped at Teal’c’s voice behind her. “Major Carter. Are you alright?”

Sam turned around and gave Teal’c a small smile before returning her vision on the scene before her. Finding her voice, she nodded absent-mindedly. “I’m okay, Teal’c. I just needed some air…it was harder than I thought it would be to watch that.” Shaking her head, she looked back at him with pleading eyes. “It’s kind of foolish. You’d think I would have been use to it, considering I watched my father go through the same thing, not to mention the fact that Colonel O’Neill has been through this before, when Hathor did it to him.”

Teal’c moved forward and placed a hand lightly on Sam’s shoulder. “I have seen many innocent lives taken by the Goa’uld. Even when I was in the service of Apophis, having to watch the countless blendings between symbiote and host…it never became something I could easily watch.” Moving around to stand in front of her, he met her eyes. “Therefore, it would only be foolish if you were not affected as you are.”

Sam studied him for a moment. He seemed so wise as he stood in front of her, his towering strength outlined by the fading light. How he always seemed to know just what to say, she didn’t fully understand, but she was grateful for his friendship and for the words he offered her. Standing up, she placed a hand on one of his well-sculpted arms. “Thanks, Teal’c.” Taking in a shaky breath, she tried to find her strength. “We probably should go back down there. I’m sure Jonas is wondering what happened to us.”

Teal’c replied. “I do not believe that Jonas Quinn is worried. When I left him, he was listening with intent interest as one of the Tok’ra explained the daily workings of their hidden bases.” Raising an eyebrow, he continued. “I have no interest in such things. I therefore came to find you. He did not seem to hear me when I told him I would return.”

Sam lightly laughed. “Well, then maybe it’s the Tok’ra we need to check on.” Pausing, her smile faded. “And we need to check on the Colonel. Hopefully, Kanan has healed him enough by now that he can speak to us.” Putting on her soldier front to keep her emotions in check, they headed back to spot where the ring transport was hidden. Teal’c used the hand device that had been given to him to activate them, and in a blink of an eye, they found themselves back underground.

The carved out passageway to which they had been transported into was quiet. Walking down the long length of the corridor, they came across a passing Tok’ra, who then led them to where Jonas was. As they approached, Sam and Teal’c could see the excitement on Jonas’ face as he explained one of the scientific discoveries from his planet. The Tok’ra he was talking to appeared to have full interest in what Jonas was saying, but Sam couldn’t be sure.

Clearing her throat, Sam smiled as she joined them. “Jonas. Having fun?”

Jonas looked over at her with bright eyes and a wide smile. “Major Carter! It’s amazing the amount of technology these people possess. He was showing me the concept of the crystals they use to grow these tunnels. The possibilities of use for these crystals on my planet, or on Earth for that matter, would be endless!”

Teal’c spoke up with a firm tone. “We are not here for means of trade, Jonas Quinn. Our focus is on Colonel O’Neill and healing him.”

Jonas turned down the smile a notch. “Right…of course. It’s just that I’ve never imagined such technologies existing!”

Sam smiled at his enthusiasm. “It’s okay, Jonas. We were all just as amazed as you are when we first found out about how the Tok’ra dig these tunnels.”

At that moment, Thoran approached them. “Major Carter. Are you alright?”

Sam looked over at him and nodded with a smile. “Yes, thank you. I just needed some air.” Searching for something more, she continued. “I guess you could say that the memory of my own experience with blending is too easily brought up in my mind.”

Thoran nodded. “That is expected and understandable.” Looking at the entire group, he continued. “Kanan spoke just a few moments ago.”

Sam’s heart jumped. “How’s Colonel O’Neill doing?”

Thoran answered her. “Kanan is still healing him. The virus that was inside his body almost killed him. There is a lot of damage to repair.”

Sam closed her eyes for a moment, trying to contain her emotions. When she opened them again, she looked at Thoran. “Can we see him?”

Thoran nodded. “Of course. This way.” As they walked to the room where the blending had taken place, Thoran addressed Sam. “Selmak contacted us a few hours ago with news from his mission. I informed him of what was happening. He told me to tell you that your father, Jacob, was sorry he couldn’t be here, but would see you as soon as he could.”

Sam missed her dad terribly, especially now. Crossing her arms over her chest, she nodded. “Thanks.” They walked the rest of the way in silence, with Jonas and Teal’c taking up the rear.

After a few minutes, they entered the room where Jack was recovering. It was lit by a variety of candles around the room, casting a shadowy glow on their surroundings. Jack was lying on a bed in the center of the room. His face was ashen, and almost lifeless. Gathering around him, Thoran spoke up. “Kanan? Can you hear me?”

After a few seconds, Kanan opened his eyes and looked around. Looking over at Thoran, he spoke. “I can. I am still weak, but growing stronger by the minute.”

Thoran continued. “This is SG-1, the teammates of Colonel O’Neill.”

Sam watched Jack’s head move as he looked first at Jonas, then Teal’c, and finally at her. His eyes settled on hers, and seemed to be looking into her inner core. Sam took a small step back. It’s was Jack’s eyes that were looking at her, but yet it wasn’t. The way Kanan was looking at her put her on edge, and she found herself coaching her heart internally that it wasn’t really Jack who was looking at her. It was just his face and his eyes.

The moment seemed to last forever. Clearing her voice nervously, she addressed Kanan. “How is Colonel O’Neill? Can he talk to us?”

Kanan continued to watch her. “Not yet. He is still too weak. The virus did a lot of damage to his organs, but I am in the process of healing them. It may take another day before he will be able to speak to you.” Pausing for a moment, he went on. “But I can hear some of his thoughts.”

Teal’c spoke up. “How is he doing?”

Kanan tilted Jack’s head. “He appears to be fine, though he has been making a lot of odd remarks, referring to them as a ‘joke’. I’m afraid that I do not understand his humor yet.”

Sam smiled. “It’s called sarcasm, and Colonel O’Neill loves to use it. You’ll just have to get use to it.” Catching herself, she quickly continued, looking over at Thoran. “Have you started searching for a new host yet for Kanan? Once Colonel O’Neill is fully healed, I know he will want his body back.”

Thoran gave her a firm look. “We have started looking, but you must be patient. It could take some time to find the right host for Kanan.”

Kanan reassured her. “Trust me, Major Carter. I do not wish to stay blended with a human who does not fully accept my presence. It makes for a very unpleasant existence.”

Jonas spoke up. “Yeah, and I can imagine that Colonel O’Neill would make your existence pretty miserable, especially if he doesn’t like you.” When Sam and Teal’c looked over at him, he took a small step back and held up a hand. “Hey, no offense. I guess I’m just remembering how hard it was for the Colonel to accept me.”

Kanan spoke up. “He didn’t like what you just said.”

Sam looked over at him. “He can hear us even though he can’t speak?”

Kanan nodded. “Yes, and he is asking me to tell you to return to Earth. He wants you to report the progress back to General Hammond.”

Sam shook her head. “I’m not going anywhere until I know Colonel O’Neill is going to be okay. I want to hear him for myself.”

Kanan smiled slightly. “He is now saying that it is an order, and is telling you not to be so stubborn. He will be okay.”

Thoran spoke up. “It will help the healing process if they are allowed to rest. You are welcome to come back tomorrow and check on him.”

Teal’c could only imagine the feelings Major Carter was fighting inside. He didn’t envy her pain. Moving towards her, he touched her elbow. “I believe we should follow O’Neill’s wishes. The quiet will allow a faster healing process.”

Looking back at Jack, she nodded finally. “Alright, but I’ll return tomorrow to check on his progress.”

Kanan nodded. “Now I must rest. My strength of healing this body is not to a full capacity when I am not completely focused on it.” Closing his eyes, he rested Jack’s head back against the pillow.

Sam continued to watch him until Thoran’s voice echoed in the room. “Come. I will escort you to the Stargate.” When Sam looked at him, he continued. “We will take good care of him. You have my word.”

Sam gave him a small smile and nodded. As they began to leave the room, Sam took up the rear. Just as she was about to exit the room, she heard Kanan’s voice again. “Major Carter.” Sam looked back at him in surprise.

His voice was softer than it had been a minute ago. “He wants me to tell you not to worry, and to remind you to look to the stars tonight.”

Sam could feel her eyes welling up with tears as she looked back at him. Was this overwhelming fear and anxiety what Jack felt when she had been possessed by Jolinar? She felt so helpless and confused as she looked at Jack. It was unnerving to hear someone else’s voice come out of his mouth. But she also understood what he was trying to tell her through Kanan: that he loved her and to seek comfort in Charlie’s star.

Finally finding the strength to nod, she gave him a smile. “Thanks. Tell him I’ll be back.” Not wanting to say anything else for fear that the others were listening, she turned around and continued out of the room, doing her best to appear as normal as possible.

Ten minutes later, after a few more words of reassurance from Thoran, the Stargate was activated, and the code submitted. As Sam approached the wormhole, she looked back for another brief moment. Somewhere under all that earth was Jack, recovering from a virus that had nearly killed him. Leaving him behind was incredibly hard. But she had to respect his wishes. She just wasn’t sure how she was going to be able to make it through the night knowing he was alone on another planet. The fact that he had a symbiote inside of him was because she had convinced him it was the only way to save him from certain death.

And though she knew that it had been the only way, what she wasn’t sure about was if she could live with herself for not giving him another option. One of the things he despised the most was now sharing his body. The burden of that proof was hard to carry, but it was a burden she would just have to somehow learn to live with until a new host could be found. With her thoughts running a hundred different ways, she let one surface clearly in her mind as she entered the Stargate. ‘I just hope you can forgive me, Jack. I can’t lose you.”

As she came through the Gate, stepping onto the metal ramp with a familiar clang, she looked back as the Stargate disengaged. It was going to be a long, lonely night.

Sam opened the door to her house, stepping into the quiet darkness of the interior. It was almost midnight, and though Sam thought she could work the night away at the base, hoping to keep her mind off of Jack and his condition, she had been wrong. For the last five hours, all she had managed to do was stare mindlessly at her computer, not even seeing what was on the screen. Every time she tried to concentrate, Jack’s face appeared before her, haunting her. After trying about everything she could to keep her mind on what she was suppose to be doing, Sam gave up and turned off the lights to her lab.

As she moved down the hallway of the SGC towards her quarters, she instead found herself on the elevators, heading towards the surface. She suddenly needed the comfort of her home. Though she knew it would be hard to be surrounded by memories from times shared between her and Jack, she felt it would be easier to just let her emotions come rather than try and contain them. She didn’t trust herself, especially after the last few unsuccessful hours in her lab. The truth was she missed him desperately.

Sam closed the door to her house and leaned back against it, dropping her keys on the floor. Closing her eyes, she became one with the darkness, and suddenly realized how exhausted she actually was. It had been a long week, one that had been physically and emotionally draining. Not caring about anything but sleep, she made her way in the dark towards her bedroom, knowing every inch of the hallway from memory.

As she reached her room, she didn’t even make an effort to turn on the light. Pulling off her clothes, she let them lay where they fell, making a short trail to her bed. Collapsing down on top of it, she pulled the covers over her head and tried to shut the world out, at least for tonight.

As she closed her eyes, she was sure that she would never fall asleep. She kept seeing Jack’s face, and hearing the voice that wasn’t his over and over again in her head. It brought tears to her eyes, causing them to sting and burn. Gradually, she allowed herself weep softly, her tears rolling carefully down her skin, until they touched the pillow, making it damp.

Crying herself to sleep, Sam’s mind rolled through the darkness until it entered a dreamworld unlike any she’d experienced before:

**The darkness faded away, and as Sam’s vision slowly cleared, she found herself sitting on a beach. With her hands to her side, she dug her fingers slowly through the white sand, loving the feel of the soft granules running over her skin as she brought her hands up. Looking down, she was dressed in a white sleeveless cotton dress that fit her perfectly, wrapping around her curves and then billowed out around her.

Moving from one sensation to the next, her ears registered the sound of the ocean. The gentle roar of the waves as they crashed to the sand sent a happy chill through her body, and made her feel at peace. Pushing herself to her feet, she walked towards the water and watched as the waves crashed softly and then spilled out white frothy bubbles in front of her, glazing the surface of the sand in a stark white. As the water retreated, it left the sand in a wet shine, temporarily painting a reflection of the sky above it on its surface. As the edge of the water spilled towards her again, it tickled her toes and sent another cool chill through her body.

The sun had just set, and the colors set against the sky were now the softest pinks and purples, fading into a predominate layer of black that had begun to claim the coming night sky. And over the horizon of the water, an early full moon began to appear, rising over the ocean as big as she’d ever seen it. The ocean was at low tide, but with the full moon rising, it would soon begin its natural turn, bringing the water further onto the shore.

Closing her eyes, she took in a deep breath of salty sea air, indulging in the smells and the feel of the ocean spray as it brushed her cheek in the light breeze whispering around her. She couldn’t remember another time when she had felt so relaxed and calm. It was as if the world had faded away and only this beautiful scene before her remained.

A voice beside her quietly met her ears. “Samantha.” It was Jack’s voice…as clear and real as it had ever been. Opening her eyes, she looked over to her left and found him beside her, watching her with that cocky smile of his.

Sam’s eyes began to tear up. “Jack!” Moving forward, she threw herself into his arms, loving the feel of his familiar strength around her as he held her tightly against him. With her head against his chest, she could actually make out his heart beating, its rhythm smooth and even, soothing her own heart. Looking up, she found him smiling softly down at her, his eyes reflecting the light from the rising moon.

Her voice was soft and full of emotion as she spoke. “Now I know this is a dream. You’re here…and you’re you!” Touching his chest, she sensed no presence of the Goa’uld that had been inside of him. Bringing her fingers up to his cheek, she traced a careful pattern around his face. “I miss you so much it actually hurts.”

Jack took her fingers and kissed their tips. “And I miss you. I just got you back from that lunatic cop, and now this happens.” Sighing softly, he went on. “We haven’t had much time together have we?”

Sam shook her head. “No, we haven’t. We have to do something about that you know.”

Jack smiled at her. “I think that’s a definite yes.” Pulling her close again, he rested his chin on top of her head. “It’s a beautiful night. We’ll have to file this one away in the memory banks.”

Sam pulled back enough to look at him. “But how is that even possible? Since this is my dream, you won’t even remember it. Instead, you’re on another planet at a Tok’ra base recovering from that virus.”

Jack put a finger under her chin, forcing her to look up at him. “How do you know it’s just your dream? Maybe we’re both dreaming the same thing?”

Sam scrunched her forehead. “But how is that possible?”

Jack laughed lightly. “Samantha Carter, always the scientist looking for the realistic, hard-core facts.” Lightly kissing her lips, he continued. “I don’t know how this could be possible, but I’d like to pretend it is rather than not. I mean, we’re suppose to be soulmates, right?”

Sam squeezed his hand. “Forever.”

Jack squeezed back. “Well, then maybe soulmates have the ability to find each other in their dreams if they’re separated from each other. Maybe Charlie’s guiding us with his star to help bring us together when he knows we’re apart. What do you think about that theory, Doctor?”

Sam smiled up at him, her eyes sparkling. “I think I like your hypothesis. And I’m not even going to try and prove it. I’m just happy you’re here.”

Jack placed a hand on her cheek. “Always.”

After a moment of gazing into each other’s eyes, Sam broke eye contact and looked around them. “It seems we have the place to ourselves.”

Jack gave her one of his smirks. “Well, that’s awfully convenient, isn’t it?” Jack took her hand and led her to the waters edge. The waves rolled in, surrounding their feet and causing their toes to sink just slightly into the heavy, wet sand. As they both looked at the water, now sparkling in the light of the full moon, Jack continued. “Care for a dip?”

Sam laughed. “In the mood for a little skinny dipping are you? Well, what about the sharks? You know they like to feed at night.”

Jack shrugged. “In my dream, there are no sharks…and who said that we had to keep our clothes dry?” Quickly scooping her up into his arms, he moved forward into the water, splashing it as he went.

Sam wrapped her arms around his neck as her carried her further out. “Jack! It’s going to be cold!”

Jack looked over at her smiled. “Well, I’ll just have to keep you warm.” Suddenly giving her a little more of a smirk than a smile, he continued. “You know, there’s one way to get use to the water really fast.”

Sam scolded him. “Jack, don’t you dare!” But before she could say anything else, he thrust her from his arms. Screaming playfully, she hit the water with the full force of her weight and plunged beneath it. The sudden cold would have usually sent her body into spasms, but this time it didn’t. Untwisting her skirt, she surfaced, the water cascading all around her as she settled in place.

Jack was in front of her, also fully wet, and giving her a sexy half grin. “Now that’s every man’s fantasy. A beautiful woman in a white dress and completely wet!”

Sam gave him an exasperated look. “Oh, I don’t think so…you’re not getting off that easily!” Using the momentum of her hands, she threw water forward, splashing him in the face. When his guard was down, she leapt forward and pushed him down underwater. Trying to stay the victor of this little battle, she suddenly felt herself losing ground as his hand reached up and began to tickle her sides. Laughing and wiggling, she let him go and started to swim, moving away from him as best as she could.

But with the weight of her dress, she was in no place to out swim him. Before she knew it, hands wrapped around her waist and pulled her back. Jack spun her around to face him. He was breathing hard, obviously just as out of breath as she was. Wagging a finger at her, he spoke up. “Now that was not very nice. You may have the brains, but you know I can out swim you.”

Sam tilted her head to the side. “Well, I could swim a lot better without this dress on.”

Jack saw his entrance. “Well, maybe I can help you with that little problem.” Moving his fingers under the water, he fingered the buttons on the front of it. With a slow motion, he carefully unbuttoned each one as he got lost in her eyes. Once he had the final button undone, he moved forward and captured her lips with his.

Sam tasted the salt on his tongue as she let him explore the inside of her mouth. Returning the favor, she moaned softly as one of his hands covered her breasts. As he caressed them softly, moving his fingers over each nipple, now hard from his touch and the velvet feel of the water around them, he took his other hand and carefully peeled the dress from one shoulder and then the other.

Sam helped him by pulling the dress off, letting the fabric float around her legs as it came off. Jack’s lips moved to her neck, tracing a pattern with his tongue, sending chills down her spine. Using her hands, she began to unbutton his shirt. Once she had done that successful, she moved her hands over his hard chest, digging her fingers into his skin as he caused her to gasp when he slowly fingered her.

Moving her hands with more urgency down to his pants, she unzipped them and then worked on the button. Once she had done that, she pushed them down over his hips. Smiling at him, she submerged herself underwater and pulled the pants off his legs. As his hands spanned her lower back, she took him in her mouth and used her tongue to give him his own set of chills. He became hard almost instantly, and Jack suddenly used his hands to pull her up to the surface. As she took in a breath of air, Jack captured her open mouth, kissing her hard.

At the same instance, he plunged deep inside of her, sending erotic thrills through her body. They moved together, both of them dizzy with pleasure. Sam wrapped her legs around him and held on for dear life as they climbed higher together. When they peaked, their bodies shuttered together as they released the built up passion between them. The water danced around them in a smooth rhythm, and as they held each other in the memory of their lovemaking, Sam looked up at the moon and smiled.

Jack’s voice brought her eyes to his. “I love you.”

Sam gently kissed him. “I love you. Let’s do this every night.”

Jack lightly laughed. “I think I could handle that. But of course, that means we have to be apart.”

Sam shook her head. “No way, O’Neill. As much as I love this dream, I want the real you beside me.”

Jack kissed her nose. “I will be, I promise. As soon as they find that thing another host, I’m all yours.”

Sam sighed sadly and held him against her. “Make it soon. That’s my order to you.”

Jack smiled into her neck. “Since when do you give me orders?”

Sam pulled back and looked at him seriously. “Since you went and had a Goa’uld put inside of you.”

Jack knuckled her cheek playfully. “Hey, I believe you were the one who convinced me to do that.”

Sam pulled away and turned her back on him. “I know. And it’s my fault that you’re in the situation that you are.”

Jack moved forward, the water quietly rippling around him. Reaching her, he put his hands at her waist and turned her to face him. Tears streamed down her cheeks and dropped in the water. “Sam, you’re not at fault for anything. The only thing you did was save my life.”

Sam looked up at him with pleading eyes. “But what if they can’t find a host? Then I will have condemned you to a life you don’t want.”

Jack held her face with both of his hands. His voice was soft but firm. “That won’t happen, do you hear me? Thoran told you that Kanan would rather die than stay in an unwilling host. And I’m definitely willing to have him out of me.”

Sam sniffed. “I know, but I still can’t help but blame myself.”

Jack furrowed his brow with worry. “You really are one of the most stubborn women I’ve ever met.” Sighing, he pulled her into his embrace. “Everything will be alright…I promise you that. You trust me, don’t you?”

Sam nodded. “Of course I do.”

Jack smiled. “Good. Then it’s settled. No more guilt.” Pulling back, he wiped at her tears. “And no more tears. I think this ocean is salty enough.”

Sam smiled then. Looking in his face, she touched his cheek. “Come home to me soon. I love you so much.”

Jack pulled her back against him and nuzzled her neck. “I love you too.”

Sam closed her eyes against the feel of his breath. His chest fell and rose in an easy rhythm against hers, and she could feel herself being drawn into the darkness once more. Mumbling no, she tired to open her eyes, but couldn’t. Jack’s breath became distant, and she could feel the pressure of his body leaving hers…**

Sam’s eyes flew open and she sat up in bed, shouting Jack’s name. The room was still dark, and everything around her was quiet. It had been a dream, but a wonderful one. The only bad part was that it left her feeling lonelier than before she had fallen asleep. But the one difference was that she had more hope in her heart.

Looking over at the clock, it read 0430 hours. Knowing the summer sun was soon to rise, she got up and made her way slowly to the bathroom. After a good hot shower and something to eat, she was going to head back to the base, and then later that morning, go back through the Stargate to check on Jack’s progress for herself. She had to see him with her own eyes. She knew that Jack would insist on doing the same for her.

Bright rays of sunlight hit Sam’s eyes as she stepped out of the Stargate from Earth and onto the planet where the Tok’ra were currently based. Stepping off the platform, she subconsciously heard to whoosh of the Gate closing behind her as she raised one hand to her forehead, shielding the light from her eyes so she could see her surroundings better.

At first, she didn’t see anybody. Her time had been pre-arranged by the Tok’ra and Earth for when she would return for an update on Jack’s progress. Teal’c and Jonas had stayed behind since this wasn’t a mission needing a full team. Her assignment was to check in with Colonel O’Neill and report back to Earth on the progress of his recovery, and the search for a new host.

Hoping against hope that Jack would be the one to meet her, she began to feel disappointment cover her heart when no one was there to meet her. As she started forward towards the spot where she knew the ring transporter was, she suddenly stopped. A short distance from her a figure moved out from behind the trees. His face was shadowed by the bright sun behind him, making it hard for her to make out more than the outline of the person approaching her.

Feeling a surge of renewed hope, she decided to take a chance at who it might be. “Colonel? Is that you?” Her voice was a little higher than usual, indicating her excitement at the possibility it could be Jack. Her mind and heart were still full of the dream she had had last night, and she wanted nothing more than to hold the real Jack in her arms.

But what hope she had was quickly quenched when a different voice answered her instead of the one she was anticipating. “Hey, Sam.” It was her father, Jacob.

As he got close enough for her to finally see his face, she tried to give him the bravest smile she could muster. “Hey, Dad.” Unfortunately, her voice gave away what she was really feeling.

Jacob could see the disappointment written all over her face, even through the smile she was trying to portray. “Well, that’s not exactly the best ‘hey Dad’ I’ve ever gotten from you. I know we just saw each other a few weeks ago, but do I have to be apart from you for longer than that in order to receive a better greeting from my one and only daughter?”

Sam lowered her hand. “Sorry, Dad. I didn’t mean to make you feel like I wasn’t happy to see you. It’s just that…”

Jacob finished for her. “You were expecting to see Jack.”

Tears spontaneously appeared in her eyes. When she could only nod because her throat became tight with the emotions she was suddenly feeling, she looked away, doing her best to contain the tears that threatened to fall.

Jacob stepped forward, touching his daughter on the arm. “Sam, honey, it’s okay.” Wrapping her in an embrace, he felt her arms close around him as her head became buried in his shoulder.

Sam sniffed and tried to keep the silent tears to a minimum. “I’m sorry, Dad. I know I’m suppose to be strong…I’m not suppose to let my personal feelings interfere. It’s just so hard. I miss him so much. And I’m so worried.”

Jacob smiled to himself. “Well, I’m relieved to hear you say that. For a second there, I thought that you were going to continue to pretend you weren’t torn up about this.” Stepping back, he cupped her face. “Sam, I know you have to put up a front for everyone else when it comes to Jack, but don’t do it with me. I deserve to know how my daughter’s really feeling. And besides, do you really think you can fool me that easily? I know how much you love Jack, and I don’t envy what you must have been going through this past week. I’m only sorry that I couldn’t be there for you.”

Sam wiped at her tears and looked at her dad through squinted eyes. “I know. You were on assignment.” Taking a cleansing breath, she continued. “I guess if Jack couldn’t have met me, I’m glad you came in his place.”

Jacob gave her a hearty smile. “Now that’s a much better show of affection for your old man.”

Sam smiled softly in return. Moving to the side so she wasn’t facing into the sun, she asked the question that had been on the forefront of her mind ever since discovering that her dad had come to meet her. “So now that we’ve established that I am happy to see you, where’s Jack? Is he okay? Is his recovery taking longer than expected?”

Jacob’s smile faded. “No, Jack’s fully recovered. He was back to his old self a few hours before daybreak, whining about wanting a cup of coffee and a bowl of oatmeal.”

Sam smiled briefly at that thought. But looking back at her dad, she could see there was more. “But…”

Jacob sighed. “But he’s in the middle of a series of meetings to try and determine what intel Kanan knows about Baal and his fortress. Needless to say he knew that you were scheduled to come today for an update on his progress and did about everything he could to get out of it. He can actually be quite irritating.”

Sam gave a quick laugh. “It sounds like Kanan did a good job at healing him. It’s just what Jack likes to do when there’s a briefing on Earth that he doesn’t want to go to.” Sam studied her father’s face for a moment before continuing. Dropping her eyes to the ground, she continued. “I take it he’s not going to be done anytime soon?”

Jacob gave her a regretful look, hating to be the one to disappoint his daughter. “I’m sorry, Sam. I know how much you wanted to see him. That’s why I thought it best if I tell you the news myself.”

Sam could hear the tinge of worry in her father’s voice. “Dad, what else aren’t you telling me?”

Jacob kicked at a pebble on the ground before continuing. “I’m afraid a suitable host hasn’t been found to be a replacement for Jack. It could take several days if not weeks before one is deemed qualified.”

Sam could feel the anger welling up inside of her. “Weeks? Are you kidding me? I thought it would only be a few days…tops!”

Jacob held up his hands. “I know, Sam. I’m sorry. These things can sometimes take time. It’s not easy to find a human that not only is willing to play host to a Goa’uld symbiote, but is also physically able to handle the kind of assignments that Kanan goes on. Frankly, Jack’s a perfect fit.”

Sam could feel her anger growing. “Dad, do I need to remind you that Jack only agreed to take Kanan as a temporary host? He would have never agreed to it if I hadn’t practically begged him to do it.”

Jacob nodded. “I know, Sam, and we’re grateful for it.”

Sam crossed her arms over her chest. “Dad, don’t you dare tell me that the Tok’ra are purposely dragging their feet on this! If they even think they’ll be able to convince Jack to stay a host, they’re sorely mistaken! And if they continue this, they may find the loyalty of the Tauri wavering.”

Jacob eyed her keenly. “Sam, calm down. No one is trying to fool anyone here.”

Sam took a breath. “How can I calm down? They way you describe it, the Tok’ra have no intention of replacing Jack as host since he seems to apparently meet the specifications that they’re looking for.”

Jacob placed his hands on his hips. “I can understand how you could get that from what I said, but you have my word that they are looking for a new host, even as we speak.”

Sam continued to stare at her father. “And he just happens to be in meetings, unable to tell me that himself. I can’t accept that. I want to talk to him myself. General Hammond is expecting me to.”

Jacob bowed his head. When he looked back up, his eyes glowed temporarily. “You’re father is telling you the truth, Samantha.” It was Selmak’s voice.

Sam sighed heavily, trying her best to quench her irritation. “I know that, Selmak. But I guess I just find it awfully amazing that we’re not any closer to finding a host for him, and now I can’t even speak to him.”

Selmak looked apologetic. “I’m sorry for what appears to be deception on our part. We have no desire to make an enemy of the Tauri. The only thing I can offer you is our word as a people that we will not back down on our promise to you. Colonel O’Neill is only a temporary host until a permanent one can be found. We are asking you to trust us, as we have trusted you.”

Sam gave him a sly smile. “You certainly know how to deal the cards, don’t you?”

Selmak bowed his head and her father was back. “Sam, please. Trust me, your father. I won’t let them go back on their word.”

Sam took a moment and then slowly nodded. “Alright, Dad. I’ll trust you on this. But I want your word that a host will be found soon.”

Jacob pinched the bridge of his nose before answering her. “Sam, I will do my best. I can’t give you a timeline, but we will do everything we can to find a new host soon.”

Sam looked over her surroundings, searching out the invisible base beneath the surface of the planet. Nodding, she turned back to the Stargate to dial home. She hated leaving without seeing Jack, but short of forcing her way into the base, she wasn’t going to get to see him. She knew that General Hammond was not going to be happy with her news, but she could only hope that the word of a former general and friend would hold some weight.

Jacob placed a hand on her shoulder. “I love you, Sam. And I promise to do everything I can to help Jack. You know that.”

Sam turned around and embraced her dad. “I know, Dad. I love you, too.” Pulling back, she gave him a smile before turning back around and finishing the dialing sequence. As the Gate activated, she put in her code to unlock the iris and then started forward.

Just as she was about to step through the wormhole, a voice calling her name registered in her ears. “Sam!” She turned around slowly, afraid her hearing was playing tricks on her. But when her eyes found the source of the sound, all she could do was smile. Running towards her at top speed was Jack, looking exhausted but incredibly handsome.

Moving forward, she ran away from the Stargate and right into Jack’s arms. It was harder to feel the weight of his body against hers with all of her gear on, but she felt him enough to know he was there. They held each other for at least a minute, both breathing hard, more from their hearts beating hard than from the running itself.

Finally, Jack pulled back enough to look into Sam’s face, encasing it with his hands. “I thought I wouldn’t make it in time to see you. I practically had to force my way out of there. They just don’t get priorities.”

Sam smiled at him. “Yeah, well I was just telling my dad that I was thinking of forcing my way in.”

Jack kissed her lips. “One of the many reasons I love you.”

Jacob cleared his throat. “Um, I hate to interrupt, but...”

Jack gave him an irritated look. “Then don’t. I think we can handle things on our own.”

Jacob crossed his arms over his chest, eyeing both of them. “That’s what I’m afraid of.” Looking directly at Jack, he continued. “Jack, you know that the counsel will have someone watching your back at all times. They’re probably on their way up the transporter right now.” Looking back at both of them, he gave them a regretful look. “I don’t think you want to risk your secret leaking out from the wrong source. It wouldn’t look good if one of the Tok’ra were to accidentally mention it to General Hammond. Since they aren’t aware of military regulations, it’s a strong possibility that it could happen. And I don’t want to see either of you get hurt that way.”

Sam looked back at Jack and gave him a sad smile. “I guess he’s right.”

Jack let out a low groan. “You know, Jacob, you really owe me now. One, for the loan of my body, and two, for making me give her up so easily…especially after not having seen her in forever!”

Jacob sighed. “Jack, quit being so dramatic.” Hearing the ring transporter in the distance, he spoke in a hurried tone. “Now, say what you need to each other. I’ll try and give you at least a minute.”

As he moved off, Sam called after him. “Thanks, Dad.”

Jack mimicked her. “Yeah, thanks Dad.”

Jacob turned his head enough to give them both a smile and a shake of his head. As he walked off to greet the two Tok’ra assigned to Jack, Sam touched Jack’s cheek. “Well, I guess this will have to do. At least we got to see each other. And I’ve got my dreams.”

Jack gave her a curious look. “Oh? And what dreams are those?”

Sam smiled. “Get your body back and I’ll show you.”

Jack whistled. “That’s all the motivation I need.” Kissing her quickly, he kept his voice low. “I love you. And don’t worry. I’ll be home soon.”

Sam kissed him back. “I love you, too. I’m going to hold you to that promise. I’ll tell General Hammond everything is going well.” With that thought, she continued. “It is, right? Are you and Kanan getting along okay?”

Jack scratched his head. “I don’t have to explain to you how incredibly weird it is to have him in my head, but yeah, we’re doing okay. We only get into arguments every few hours.”

Sam smiled. “Sounds about right.” Squeezing Jack’s hand, she regretfully let it go and walked back to the DHD and dialed Earth. Jack followed her and put his hand discreetly on the small of her back. Appling pressure, Sam smiled at his touch. “I’m going to miss you.”

Jack moved to her side as if observing her dialing the gate. “I miss you already. I’ll be back soon, and then we can make up for lost time.”

Sam looked over at him, a sad spark in her eye. “I just wish we didn’t have to. I still feel responsible for you being here.”

Jack touched her arm, giving her a serious look. “And I don’t want you blaming yourself. You saved my stubborn ass from certain death. I’m just glad you have your own stubborn streak.”

Sam punched in her code again and then turned to him. Over his shoulder, she could see her dad and the two Tok’ra looking on. Knowing she couldn’t show him the kind of affection she wanted, she instead took his hand and gave it a squeeze. “Take care of yourself. I’ll see you soon.”

Jack squeezed back. “It’s a date.” Giving her an affectionate smile, he let go of her hand and watched with the others as she walked up to the Gate. Sam turned around and gave her dad a smile and then looked longingly at Jack. Holding his gaze for a moment, she knew that he could hear what was in her heart. Satisfied for that moment, she turned back around and stepped into the wormhole.

Later that night, Jack sat in his quarters inside the Tok’ra base. He had been trying to go to sleep for hours, without much success. His mind was on Sam and the look of longing in her eyes right before she had stepped through the Gate. He hated not being able to go with her. There was also a sadness in her eyes, and he knew that she would continue to blame herself for his situation until he was back on Earth. And he hated the fact that he couldn’t do anything to ease the guilt she shouldn’t even be feeling.

Kanan suddenly interrupted his thoughts. ‘Your love for her is incredible. I am only sorry that I am keeping you from her.’

Jack, jumping at the extra voice in his head responded. “Don’t you people know how to knock…you can’t just go busting into a guy’s head like that.’ Taking a breath, he continued with a little more patience. ‘But considering you saved me from dying, I can’t really complain too much. But keep interrupting my thoughts, and I may change that verdict.’

Kanan responded. ‘You are very lucky to have to her in your life.’

Jack closed his eyes and listened for a moment before responding. ‘I know. So tell me about Shayla.’

Kanan proceeded to tell Jack about how he had fallen in love with a slave of Baal’s that he had been using to access information on Baal and his secrets. ‘I made a promise to her to return for her. If it wasn’t for her, I would have never accessed the personal information that I did…or escaped with my life.’

Jack could feel the conflicting feelings growing inside of him. It was a sad story, and one that shouldn’t end where it was left at now. Jack wanted to get back to Sam so badly, but knew that he couldn’t live with himself if he walked away from Kanan without trying to help. It wasn’t in him to leave someone behind, and now that he had this snake in his head, it was next to impossible to ignore his values. And snake or not, he couldn’t leave an innocent life in the hands of Baal if he could do something to help her. He had to at least try.

An hour later, in the quiet of the night as everyone slept, Jack found himself in front of the Stargate, dialing the DHD, except he wasn’t dialing Earth. He was dialing Baal’s planet. He wasn’t sure about what he was doing, but he had to try. He only hoped that they could pull this off without any complications. It was going to take a small miracle…a miracle to get back and a miracle to keep Sam from killing him once she found out.

As the Gate activated, he took a look around him and then stepped up to the wormhole. Taking a breath, he could hear his own mind yelling no, but his heart was pulling him forward, telling him it was the right thing to do. And with Kanan needing his help, he couldn’t turn back now. With his thoughts on Sam, he took another step and entered the Stargate, on his way to an uncertain fate and place, but hopefully a certain and successful return. And Sam was all the motivation he needed to fight his way out, if it came down to that.

Next story---> "The Heart Of The Matter"

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